Ohh blog of mine, you are so lonesome and nekids. Where are the posts and stories? Well, I have been busy swimming in the ocean - yes, I met a mermaid.
She makes the coolest clothes out of shells! They always show mermaids in movies that get legs for a period of time, but let me tell you now, that's just Hollywood mumbo jumbo. Mermaids stay in the water ... always. Her name is Kwallinapollinatooeewaliwalichee. I forgot it a few times and almost ruined the entire affair, so I said it 100 times in the shower. I sing in there too you know. Anyway, going out to dinner with a mermaid is cheap. I no longer need a wallet or any money. We eat fish and sea weeds (mine with a light vinaigrette). Turtles? They are so funny, and never forget anything, kind of like an elephant with a shell, "unsalted". If everything works out, we may be married by late September, which would be slick because that's when mermaids lay eggs.